Where Are You Christmas?
by SeulWolfe
Summary: SlashHet::Father Christmas needs Harry and friends help this year because he's laying in the infirmary as Albus Dumbledore after helping Harry defeat Voldemort in the final battle. Harry must get past his own insecurities and past demons to truly learn w
1. Chapter 1

Tittle::Where Are You Christmas

Author:: SeulWolfe/Calanor

Rating:: Mature (M)Eventually NC-17

Pairing:: Snape/Harry, Remus/Lucius, Draco/Ron, Sirius/Bill, Hermione/Charlie, Neville/Luna, mentions of Harry/Cedric

Contains:: angst, drama, romance, AU

Warnings:: Spoilers through book 4, with some changes... NO book 5 or 6

Summary:: Father Christmas needs Harry and friends help this year because he's laying in the infirmary as Albus Dumbledore after helping Harry defeat Voldemort in the final battle. Harry must get past his own insecurities and past demons to truly learn what the Christmas spirit is. Maybe this year, Santa will help him find love to last a lifetime as well.

A/N:: This fic is dedicated to anonymous for the gift of paid LJ time. Thank you... and to my best friend.. Morganlefay1958.

_**Merry Christmas and Blessed Yuletide. **_

_**Chapter One **_

"He's what!"

"Please sit down, Mr. Weasley." Minerva McGonagall glared at everyone gathered. Especially the youngest male Weasley. If this was going to work, she had to have everyone's cooperation and they had to understand.

"Minerva..." Severus began, "Do you mean to tell us, that Albus Dumbledore, one of the greatest wizards alive... once a year dresses up like Santa Claus?"

"No, Severus, Albus is Santa."

"Does that make... " Fred Weasley began...

"... you Mrs. Claus?" George finished.

Minerva's lips thinned. "I am Mrs. Claus and I'm glad you find this funny."

"I don't." One voice cut through the giggles, whispers and soft laughter. Harry Potter, the boy who lived, the man who destroyed Voldemort once and for all, stood up from the table, exited from the meeting room of the Order of the Phoenix.

The young man was already riding an emotional roller coaster after the final battle where Albus Dumbledore almost died trying to protect Harry as he fought with Tom Riddle.

Now he laid in a magical sleep where in time he will make a full recovery. But now...

Albus Dumbledore is Father Christmas.

That statement alone left Harry cold.

In his wanderings, Harry found himself at the top of the astronomy tower standing in the bitter cold with unanswered questions floating around in his mind. The most prominent... where was Father Christmas when he lived in the cupboard under the stairs?

Where was he when he wished for love?

Where was he when he had to watch Dudley open all of his presents and he got nothing?

Where was Father Christmas? Didn't he see? Or did he turn a blind eye?

Harry couldn't hold back the grief as the sobs broke through and he fell to his knees. Wrapping his arms tightly around himself.

**pqpqpq**

Severus Snape silently followed Harry through the halls, and up the stairs to the Tower. From the shadows, he watched the emotions cross the young man's face, the hurt flow and gather around him, then the tears and grief-filled sobs as he sunk to the cold stone floor. The man who lived a cold and lonely life wanted nothing more than to gather this passionate man and hold him close to his heart. Hold him through whatever grief was coursing through his soul.

"Harry?"

Severus stepped further into the shadows as Minerva came rushing up the stairs, and moved toward the grieving young man.

"I--I wish to be alone, Professor." Harry managed, between sobs as he wiped at his face.

"I know you're upset. And you have a lot of questions."

Laughing harshly, a sneer on his face, "Upset? Questions?"

"Harry..." She held out a hand to touch his shoulder, but pulled back when she saw the expression in his eyes.

"Tell me please, Professor… or is it Mrs. Christmas? Where was Father Christmas when I lived in the cupboard?"

Silence.

"Where was Father Christmas when I had to watch Dudley open his presents and I wasn't even allowed to touch, let alone look at the tree?"

More silence as Harry stood and turned a tear stained face and sad green eyes towards his former head of house.

"Where was Father Christmas when I wished for, begged for someone to take me away and love me?" Minerva covered her mouth to hold back a cry.

**_"_**Maybe Uncle Vernon was right. Father Christmas didn't bring presents to freaks. It's why my parents died. It's why I'm alone, and always will be, no matter how good I am."

Harry took a deep shuddering breath, "And now you want me to help Father Christmas?"

From his pocket he pulled out his shrunken Firebolt, enlarged it, and flew away into the cold winter's night.

**pqpqpqp **

_**TBC...**_


	2. Chapter 2

Tittle::Where Are You Christmas 2/?

Author:: SeulWolfe/Calanor

Rating:: Mature (M)Eventually NC-17

Pairing:: Snape/Harry, Remus/Lucius, Draco/Ron, Sirius/Bill, Hermione/Charlie, Neville/Luna, Fred/George, mentions of Harry/Cedric

Contains:: angst, drama, romance, AU

Warnings:: Spoilers through book 4, with some changes... NO book 5 or 6

Summary:: Father Christmas needs Harry and friends help this year because he's laying in the infirmary as Albus Dumbledore after helping Harry defeat Voldemort in the final battle. Harry must get past his own insecurities and past demons to truly learn what the Christmas spirit is. Maybe this year, Santa will help him find love to last a lifetime as well.

A/N:: This fic is dedicated to anonymous for the gift of paid LJ time. Thank you... and to my best friend.. Morganlefay1958.

_**Merry Christmas and Blessed Yuletide. **_

_**Chapter Two**_

Harry landed an hour later in Godric's Hollow, frozen and cold to the bone. The door opened as he approached and closed immediately behind him. It wasn't the same house that he spent his first year in with his parents, but it was home to him now.

It was his.

It was open and airy.

There was no cupboard under the stairs--no place in the basement to be locked into. Only Dobby and Winky went down to the basement. A wave of his hand and the fireplace roared to life in the living room, as he settled himself down on the large plushy couch. Harry had always thought that Father Christmas was a legend, a story to tell children to make them behave.

He hated the holidays. Everyone had someone. The Weasley's... well they had each other and their spouses. They had made him feel like a part of the family, but he didn't have someone to call his own. Not since Cedric died. Even Sirius was part of the Weasley Clan by marrying Bill at the Summer Solstice this past year. Hermione married Charlie the same day and was expecting a child anytime now. Ginny tried her best to get her claws in him after Cedric died, but he was not going to go that road. Not after the Love Potion catastrophe. Clutching a pillow to his chest, Harry fell asleep on the couch and soon found himself walking through an old Victorian house.

"Harry! Harry Potter!"

A white haired gentleman with a short, neatly trimmed beard, stepped from nowhere--a man who looked an awful lot like Dumbledore. Harry stopped, and stared, eyes narrowed.

Then another stepped forward, "Hello, my boy."

"Albus!" Harry looked between both men, "Who are you?"

"I am Father Christmas, but my friends and brothers call me Tiberius."

Harry frowned, "But Albus Dumbledore is Father Christmas."

"Well yes, but only for the last twelve years."

"I don't understand." Harry looked back and forth between the very similar men standing before him.

"What don't you understand, child." Father Christmas asked.

"How can you be Father Christmas... and the Headmaster as well?

The room they stood in, shifted to a lovely warm parlor. "Lets sit while I explain, Harry." The large man who looked every bit like Santa, but different, sat down in a plump chair. A large mug of hot cocoa appeared in his hands. "Please have some," a wave of his hand, similar mugs of cocoa appeared in Albus and Harry's hands.

"There are many of us. Some have passed on. Others are still lingering about, still doing their part to keep the Santa magic alive. They love to sit in the malls and hear the hearts desires of small children. I, myself, have backed up Albus here during the war, when he couldn't get away to deliver presents. Or could only do half the job. Some of us still help out. There are a lot of children to deliver to."

Harry looked out to the side. Swallowing his emotions, "How did I get missed?"

The old man took a sip of the hot brew, "I did leave you presents, Harry. But for some reason you didn't receive them."

"The Dursley's--but, they would have done something."

"Like what my Boy?"

"Uncle Vernon would have destroyed them in front of me or give them to Dudley, just to make me feel even more unwanted." Pain flashed in his eyes at the memories of empty Christmases.

"I'm guessing they gave them to your Cousin."

Harry nodded. "But other years?"

"You disappeared from my lists."

"And Dudley?"

The old man cleared his throat. "I think even you would realize he wouldn't show up on my list-of good children."

The men were silent for a long moment, "But how did I not show up on your list. I tried to be good. All I wanted was for someone to love me--even the Dursley's. I cleaned, cooked and didn't do anything freakish."

Albus closed his eyes. So many wrongs. So many bad decisions. His heart ached for the lonely boy Harry had been, and the part of him that was still that lonely boy. He never thought that Petunia Dursley couldn't, wouldn't, see past the magic and see the child. Harry as a baby had been a delight. His chubby smile would light up a room with his own special magic. How anyone could not love such a child, he could not begin to fathom. Looking down at his hands, he thought that maybe he shouldn't have stopped Severus, Remus, Sirius and Lucius from having their revenge that summer when they found a broken Harry. Rubbing a place over his heart, he wondered, how could he make it up to him?

"Tiberius, what happened? When he came to Hogwarts, he was there-on the list."

"Harry? When you were growing up... did you ever give up on me? Did you ever think of yourself as a 'nobody'?"

By now, Harry was crying silent tears. "So I did this to myself?"

"NO! No, I think you forgot to believe in me. I also think to make yourself more normal to them and accept you as yourself; you started to believe you were a 'nobody'. That was, until you came to Hogwarts and experienced magic. You saw that there were things to believe in again. You found your faith in the world again, when you saw that not everyone was like your relatives."

Albus looked up and stared into Harry's eyes. "There was something you received that first Christmas at Hogwarts that also gave you comfort, and continued to do so, for many nights after."

Eyes widened, "Jamie..." Harry whispered. Albus smiled.

"You gave me Jamie?"

"Where did you think that dragon came from?"

"I didn't. I thought maybe Hagrid." Harry wiped a tear away, "Dudley tried to destroy it that summer. Even Uncle Vernon tried. He said children like me didn't deserve toys. It drove him mad that he couldn't even mar that dragon, so he took Jamie away from me and told me I wouldn't get him back. But the next morning… Jamie was with me in my cupboard… my locked cupboard. After that, Uncle Vernon just pretended Jamie didn't exist. Though he did turn a violent shade of purple every time Jamie spit smoke." Harry smiled at the memory for a moment.

"I thought you were given a room of your own?"

"I was, but they still used that cupboard for punishments. Aunt Petunia would fret at him that they were being watched, but he didn't care. He locked me in there anyway. That didn't stop until Sirius escaped and they found out he was my godfather."

"I did wrong by you, Harry. I should have known something was wrong."

"Albus, I kept my secrets. I was ashamed of what was happening to me. I learned quickly that anything and everything became front-page news in the Prophet, so I stayed quiet. But Christmas always reminded me that I was alone."

Albus thought for a moment. "The Weasley's consider you their eighth child. Molly has said that often enough."

"I know, but I'm not. It's like being in a room full of people and still being alone. Always alone, never part of the whole."

Tiberius sat forward, "Christmas is a time of renewal. A time to reach out and seek what you desire the most. To give and to receive. To listen to the music. The lights. The decorated trees. Mistletoe. Caroling. The Yule Log. Spending time with those you care the most about, and to just to feel the joy of the season. Christmas is a feeling that lives in all of us."

Albus leaned forward and took Harry's hand in his old one. "Tom Riddle is dead, Harry. It's time to live your life anyway you want. Cedric wouldn't want you to grieve forever and live a life alone. You were meant for so much more than killing off a dark wizard."

Harry's head was bowed as he absorbed the words, "There was a time when I didn't think I would live to see past that. I never saw myself old or having a family."

"That was one of your wishes," Tiberius said, "You wished for family. The mistakes have been made, but the wish still stands. Isn't it time to quit dwelling in the past and move into the future? You can still have your wish. You can have a family of your own to love and to love you. You just need to take the steps, make the effort to spread the spirit of Christmas."

Harry laughed through his tears, "Like helping Santa and his elves make sure Christmas happens?"

"Of course," Albus was twinkling full force. "And I'll be helping as well. Other reinforcements are coming...can't have a wayward child spy a Santa that looks like one those Weasley's can we?"

"I think Fred and George delivering presents may not be a good idea... what do you think Harry?" The blue eyes glinted with mischief.

It warmed Albus' heart to see Harry smile and hear genuine laughter. Something, which had been missing for some time from the young man's life. This Christmas would indeed be different, if for no other reason, than to bring Harry Potter back to the land of the living, as a whole valued individual.

"But it might be funny to see Severus dressed up as Santa... red might be a good color on him."

Three men joined in laughter.

Yes, it was a time of Healing.

**pqpqpqpq **

_TBC ..._


	3. Chapter 3

Tittle::Where Are You Christmas 3/?

Author:: SeulWolfe/Calanor

Rating:: Mature (M)Eventually NC-17

Pairing:: Snape/Harry, Remus/Lucius, Draco/Ron, Sirius/Bill, Hermione/Charlie, Neville/Luna, mentions of Harry/Cedric

Contains:: angst, drama, romance, AU

Warnings:: Spoilers through book 4, with some changes... NO book 5 or 6

Summary:: Father Christmas needs Harry and friends help this year because he's laying in the infirmary as Albus Dumbledore after helping Harry defeat Voldemort in the final battle. Harry must get past his own insecurities and past demons to truly learn what the Christmas spirit is. Maybe this year, Santa will help him find love to last a lifetime as well.

A/N:: This fic is dedicated to anonymous for the gift of paid LJ time. Thank you... and to my best friend.. Morganlefay1958.

_**Merry Christmas and Blessed Yuletide. **_

_**Chapter Three **_

It was a mixed group of men and one woman who appeared from nowhere on Privet Drive. It had been many years since they had reason to come to this ordinary muggle place. Ron hated the place, knowing what Harry had suffered there. He clearly remembered the summer that Harry had to be saved from the muggles.

Harry had been doing odd jobs for Mrs. Figg, an elderly neighbor, Squib and Order member. When he not shown up on his scheduled days, for two weeks, she flooed to Hogwarts in a frantic state. "All she could say was that Petunia Dursley said 'Harry ran away. And Good Riddance.'"

Remus Lupin, Sirius Black, Lucius Malfoy and Severus Snape apparated to an point outside the wards protecting the home on Privet Drive. When they returned an hour later, they brought with them what appeared to be a bundle of bloody rags.

Hermione had screamed and Ron… well, Ron had to be stupefied as he ran out of the house, muttering about damned Muggles who didn't deserve to have someone like Harry in their lives. The red headed best friend of the boy who lived, for all intents and purposes was going to avenge his friend; his quiet and gentle friend who wouldn't hurt anyone.

It was a summer of many changes. Of many revelations and secrets. Harry had said that the changes had begun when Voldemort had risen again, and no one believed him that something was going to happen.

Well something did and Harry almost died. He hadn't been the same since the end of the tournament when Viktor Krum had pushed Cedric out of the way, and grabbed the cup with Harry and been portkeyed with him, away to the graveyard.

Viktor died and Harry dueled the Dark Lord.

Hermione and Ron stayed at Harry's side for weeks. Not that anyone else left it either. They couldn't bring him to Hogwarts because Fudge was making daily visits. Noone really knew why. But, Hogwarts knew that one of her children needed her, and for that reason alone, a cottage appeared nestled just inside the Forbidden Forest. You couldn't see it if Hogwarts didn't want you too. It was there, that Harry was relocated at the first opportunity. The Weasley's, Sirius, and Remus stayed in the magical cottage with him.

Come September first and summer's end, Harry still wasn't well enough to return to school. So certain trusted professors went to the cottage to teach him. Hermione came every evening and studied with him. Remus tutored him in other magical subjects when he became bored. Bringing him books and other things to occupy his time bedfast.

It was October when Harry could finally stand on his own again. He wasn't able to walk yet, but able to bear his own weight for the first time in months.

It was during those long weeks and months of watching Harry heal from his physical and emotional wounds, that Ron found another friend; an unexpected and unlikely one.

Draco Malfoy.

The Cottage had become a meeting place for the Order. Draco would come to visit his Father, Lucius, who, like Severus Snape, spied for the Order. No one had seen that friendship coming. It blindsided everyone, especially Ron and Draco. Ron still blushes when Harry reminds him of that. But he wouldn't change his choice for anything now. Not after he'd discovered the real man behind the aristocratic mask. Oddly enough, it was Christmastime that year, and they'd been caught under the Mistletoe.

His life was never the same; it was better.

pqpqpq

It was in the late evenings that Severus came; flooing from the Castle to the cottage. He sat and watched as a very exhausted Harry slept. When Harry awoke late at night, that first time, startled, all they did was glare at each other; each daring the other to speak. Neither man remembers who spoke first, only that they finally did, then didn't stop.

At first it was little tidbits about their childhoods. Then they moved on to individual interests, then to mutual ones. It was a cleansing of their souls. Harry understood the darkness Severus walked in, surrounded himself in, and was addicted to.

Harry also felt the sinister attraction of the Dark Arts. Severus helped him see the similarities between himself and Tom Riddle. But, Harry had an innocent soul. He had decided long ago, he would never walk that path of death and destruction. He was determined to do what he was destined to do-what had to be done; see to the destruction of the monster that had deprived him of his parents, and taken the lives of countless others. It wasn't revenge. It was karma.

Somewhere along the way, during time spent with the boy who-became-a-man, Severus started seeing Harry, instead of Potter. They had formed a bond; become kindred spirits of a sort. They shared similar experiences and similar pain.. Severus found he cared for Harry, felt empathy for what he had suffered. And, Harry returned those feelings.

Now they have returned full circle to the beginnings of Harry's pain. It was a time for answers to questions left unanswered long ago.

Severus stood beside Minerva as they appeared at 12 Privet Drive, followed one by one, by the rest of their group they walked towards number four Privet Drive.

They promptly knocked on the front door of the normal looking house…

pqpqpq

Vernon Dursley shouted out for his lazy son to answer the door. The ungrateful whelp would do nothing but sit in his room all day playing on the Internet, sleep, or go clubbing at night. The boy, who he'd had such high hopes for, so long ago, had flunked out of boarding school. Things had reached a point where, no amount of money would persuade the school to keep him. He blamed that 'freak' that was left on their doorstep. He blamed his wife's family for their defective blood, producing 'freaks', and he's been saddled with one of them. He should have taken the unwanted vermin to the orphanage, when he was abandoned on their doorstep, that November morning; Or taken his sister, Marge's advice, and drowned the boy, like a defective puppy.

Maybe, if he and Petunia had, Dudley would have turned out better. Now Dudley was lazy and useless, taking up space and eating them out of house and home.

When he heard the knock again, and not the thundering of his son coming down the stairs, Vernon just growled. "I'll get the bloody door myself."

Vernon fumbled with the doorknob before he swung the door open. His eyes widened and his blood pressure rose. "What are you bloody freaks doing here?! Get off my property this instant!"

pqpqpq

Lucius Malfoy, pureblood wizard, Death Eater, and covert spy for the Order, had no use for Muggles. Well not all Muggles, only the narrow-minded, and ignorant ones. Only those who couldn't see past prejudiced upbringings; never learning tolerance. This obese monstrosity and waste of flesh was a poster child for the Dark Lord's cause. It made him want to scream, "This is why Voldemort was 'born', creating a madman from the ashes of an innocent boy!"

In one swift movement, he had his wand at the throat of the ugly Muggle, his nose only millimeters from the florid face. "We have unfinished business, Dursley." Lucius purred dangerously.

pqpqpqp

_**TBC...**_


	4. Chapter 4

Tittle::Where Are You Christmas 4/?

Author:: SeulWolfe/Calanor

Rating:: Mature (M)Eventually NC-17

Pairing:: Snape/Harry, Remus/Lucius, Draco/Ron, Sirius/Bill, Hermione/Charlie, Neville/Luna, Fred/George, mentions of Harry/Cedric

Contains:: angst, drama, romance, AU

Warnings:: Spoilers through book 4, with some changes... NO book 5 or 6

Summary:: Father Christmas needs Harry and friends help this year because he's laying in the infirmary as Albus Dumbledore after helping Harry defeat Voldemort in the final battle. Harry must get past his own insecurities and past demons to truly learn what the Christmas spirit is. Maybe this year, Santa will help him find love to last a lifetime as well.

A/N:: This fic is dedicated to anonymous for the gift of paid LJ time. Thank you... and to my best friend.. Morganlefay1958.

_**Chapter Four**_

Harry stretched out as he woke slowly from his dreams. He looked down and in his arms was Jamie. His dragon. He smiled now that he knew where the green and purple plushy came from--his faithful friend.

He frowned for a moment. He had left the castle last night highly upset by the memories of the Christmas' of his early childhood, brought on by the revelation that Albus Dumbledore was Father Christmas, ever since he was a First Year.

Everyone was probably worried about him. He hadn't been exactly open with his friends these past couple of weeks. Not since he and Tom Riddle had decided on a formal duel, which had morphed into an all-out Final Battle.

Harry had been frayed around the edges for days before the battle... and in the days since ... since he watched Albus fall, defending him against the Death Eaters, while he faced Tom for the final time.

Harry hadn't known where it came from; rage or despair, but as he watched Albus fall in slow motion to the ground, it was like watching Cedric die all over again. All he knew was that the monster that had dictated his life for so long was dead. He still couldn't remember how the sword appeared in his hand, only that it did. Riddle never knew what hit him as Harry charged him and attacked without any thought to his own life. Only that it ended. And ended now as he drove the sword through the monster. He collapsed to his knees and crawled to Albus, his heart breaking with each movement that brought him closer to the man he had come to see as a Grandfather. He couldn't loose him now, not after all this—after they'd finally won peace for all Wizardkind. Peace, peace would not be enough for him, if he lost Albus—the thought pained him greatly, as he e reached out with trembling fingers to feel a faint pulse under his beard.

But it was no wonder he hated the holidays, he almost loses Albus right before them, just like... just like Cedric was taken from him three years ago right before Christmas.

That Christmas—the one that was to be his first big family one with Cedric. They had been planning a big family Christmas with the Diggory's and Weasley's, along with a few others. Even with the war overshadowing the world, and darkness threatening to destroy any type of happiness, Harry was planning like a madman, and thrumming with excited anticipation of the festivities. Driving Cedric mad with shopping, decorating and baking. Harry had never had a family Christmas, and this is would be the first of many… until that fateful day in Hogsmeade.

Harry's eyes teared up as he remembered that snowy day in December only three days before Christmas as Death Eaters appeared around them. They had just stepped out of Madam Puddifoot's, arms full of packages, faces flushed with excitement. Harry hadn't thought anything could bring him down from his high, but watching Cedric's face go from happy and full of life to dull and lifeless in a matter of seconds, broke Harry in ways that day that no one knew how to fix. The skirmish around him went unnoticed, as he dropped the packages and ran to Cedric, feeling for a pulse, begging him to still be alive. All his training left him in that instant, taking him from battle-trained Auror to grieving lover. He had been inconsolable when they'd taken Cedric from his arms, and even more so when they buried Cedric on Christmas Eve. Harry stood between Ron and Hermione, each holding onto him tightly. It may have appeared to others that they were supporting him, but, somehow he felt his friends knew if they didn't, he would have thrown himself on Cedric's casket when they lowered it into the cold hard ground.

Just as hard and cold as his heart now was. He remembered, as he looked to the overcast sky above, filled with gray clouds, feeling the bits of ice falling from the sky. Even the angels were crying, as Cedric left this world and traveled to the next, leaving Harry behind.

After the funeral, he locked himself away at Godric's Hollow, spending that Christmas intoxicated, willing the darkness to swallow him whole and to take away the pain of death that surrounded him.

He woke up on Boxing Day, with a massive headache and the hangover from Hell, surrounded by empty Ol' Ogden's bottles. Not that he cared at the time, until he stumbled into the parlor, where the tree still stood with its twinkling lights. The lights still lit and the presents still untouched. He had just raised his hand to banish it when he heard a low whining and yipping. Some of the presents began moving, followed by a yellow ball of fur crawled out from under the tree with a big red bow around it's neck. A chewed up bow, but one none the less.

Blurry eyed, Harry glared at the offending intruder. He didn't want or need this now. He just wanted to be numb to the pain that filled him. Picking up the pup, he checked the tag to see which of his friends had thought he needed this animal. He gasped and almost dropped the pup onto the floor. The previous summer, Cedric and Harry had visited an elderly Uncle in the Colonies, who raised magical animals. His specialty was Golden Retrievers bred to a high intelligence and trained to work with American Aurors. The dogs' job was to protect their wizards and witches in dangerous situations, bonding with them as familiars. There had been a new litter born two weeks before, and Harry had played with the tumbling puppies during the visit. Now, in his arms, was his Christmas gift from Cedric. The tag on the pup's bow read, "To the man who holds my heart. May this little ball of fur grow up and protect you when I'm not there to watch your back. Love, Cedric."

Stunned, Harry's legs gave out and he dropped to the floor. The pup, sensing his distress, licked his face and whined. Harry buried his face in the warm fur, and finally let his last barriers fall, and he sobbed into that warm fur---the last gift from his beloved. The pup lay there, quietly in his arms, as if he knew Harry needed this. When the shuddering of Harry's body and the wracking sobs finally slowed and stopped, the pup gently nuzzled Harry's head and hair, trying to get to his face. When Harry raised his head and looked down at the big brown eyes, the pup yipped and licked Harry's tears away. He moved to sit on the couch, with the pup in his lap. Reaching down to the collar around the pup's neck, "Angelo," he whispered as he read the tag.

Harry came back to the present, when he felt the couch give under extra weight. He looked over to see Angelo, his partner in crime, sitting next to him. Angelo barked and then put his head on Harry's shoulder.

"We could always transfigure something into antlers, for you to wear."

Angelo glared. Harry snorted. From where Jamie the stuffed dragon was sitting, a puff of smoke rose from his green nostrils; almost as if he were laughing. Angelo snapped his jaws together as he glared even harder at the offending purple plushy.

"Maybe not. And you're spending too much time with Severus. Quit glaring at me. Don't you want to help me to help Father Christmas? It might be fun to see Severus in red." Harry smirked and Angelo barked, his tongue lolling happily out of the side of his mouth.

"The world keeps changing, Angelo," Harry's fingers were tangled in the warm golden fur. "My world keeps changing and it's dragging me along with it. No matter how hard I try to stay away from it. Even Christmas. As much as I hate the season, it keeps finding me."

Harry stood up and headed towards the stairs. He needed a bath before he went back to Hogwarts. They only had so much to time to get organized to help Father Christmas.

As much as he hated it, it looked like Harry Potter was going to into the Christmas spirit one or another--even if they had to take him kicking and screaming.

_**TBC...**_

_A/N:: I hope everyone is enjoying this story... If anyone has any ideas.. i'm open.. for anything that can happen while they ready for xmas.. _

_SeulWolfe/Calanor_


	5. Chapter 5

Tittle::Where Are You Christmas 5/?

Author:: SeulWolfe/Calanor

Rating:: Mature (M)Eventually NC-17

Pairing:: Snape/Harry, Remus/Lucius, Draco/Ron, Sirius/Bill, Hermione/Charlie, Neville/Luna, Fred/George, mentions of Harry/Cedric

Contains:: angst, drama, romance, AU

Warnings:: Spoilers through book 4, with some changes... NO book 5 or 6

Summary:: Father Christmas needs Harry and friends help this year because he's laying in the infirmary as Albus Dumbledore after helping Harry defeat Voldemort in the final battle. Harry must get past his own insecurities and past demons to truly learn what the Christmas spirit is. Maybe this year, Santa will help him find love to last a lifetime as well.

A/N:: This fic is dedicated to anonymous for the gift of paid LJ time. Thank you... and to my best friend.. Morganlefay1958.

**Chapter 5**

Harry and Angelo apparated to the gates of Hogwarts. From there they trudged through the snow, and up to the front doors. He stomped the snow off his boots and they headed towards the infirmary, where he found Poppy fussing over an awakening Albus Dumbledore.

"You should still be sleeping. What do you think you're doing?"

"I need to talk to my boy, that's what! Quit fussing woman!"

"Well. I never in all my years..."

"As Harry would say... there's a first time for everything!" Albus knew Harry would be heading back to the castle soon. He wanted to be awake to see him; to make sure he understood.

Harry stood just outside the doors and giggled. Angelo woofed quietly as he leaned against Harry's leg.

Albus' head whipped around, his eyes twinkling, and tears brimming at the corners. "My boy… I'm so sorry."

Harry was at his side, in moments, holding the warm frail hand in his own. He could feel the strength still in those fingers. He gave that hand a squeeze and smiled down at Albus. Angelo's tail could be heard as it thumped on the floor.

"I've made so many mistakes with you. I should have listened to Minerva, or just brought you to the castle. Because of them… and my faith in them, your chance at a normal childhood was denied." He wiped away a tear as it escaped the corner of his eye.

"Too many what ifs, and what could have beens, should haves, and would haves. I was blindsided by the fact that you are Father Christmas, and it was another thing kept from me. It brought forth all the bad memories of my past. The lost childhood, and watching Dudley have the love I wanted so badly." Harry petted Angelo's head as he spoke, the motion grounding him.

Harry wandlessly conjured a comfortable chair and sat down, while still holding Albus' hand. "We've been family far too long now for me to stay angry. I need to shed the anger of my childhood and live in the present."

"This is why you defeated Tom, Harry. Your capacity for love and forgiveness. Even when I feel I don't deserve your forgiveness."

"Well, Headmaster, it is my forgiveness, so it is up to me to decide that you deserve it." Harry replied with a warm smirk.

"I also assure you, my boy, that I will be around for a very long time. Dumbledore's are descended from Merlin himself, and we live very long lives."

"So you plan on driving Severus batty with lemon drops for a very long time then--yeah?"

"Well of course."

Both men broke out in giggles at Albus' innocent expression. "Does Angelo plan on going with you as you deliver presents?"

"I think he would look good with some antlers." Angelo woofed again, whined, and backed up. "You big baby. They would be fake and just tied to your head. Just like that movie we watched last year with Ron. The Grinch who stole Christmas."

Angelo shook his head and sneezed twice. Antlers indeed. What self-respecting dog wears antlers…? He whined and lay down on the floor, putting his paws over his muzzle. Harry laughed and turned back to Albus.

He sat down in the chair next to the bed. Albus was still weak and weariness won over and pulled him back into sleep. Needing to be close, Harry made himself comfortable by laying his head on Albus' beard. Just listening to the older man's heartbeat. It was a calming proof that he was still alive. His will to live, still strong. He sighed as Albus carded his fingers through his messy hair.

He loved this old man, no matter what. The smell of lemon drops always meant safety, if not home. Harry leaned up, kissed the old man on the cheek, and slipped off to use the loo. He hadn't taken that long but when he went to open the door; he heard voices and his name.

Through the crack of the door, he saw Albus' bed was surrounded, by Minerva, Sirius, Remus and Severus, and the Malfoy's, and several of the Weasley's. Ron was speaking, and his words stopped him cold. They had gone to the Dursley's…

**pqpqpqpq**

Severus lagged behind his fellows as they made their way back into the castle from their late night journey. He had much to think about; even more now than when it all came to light that summer after the tournament. They had answers to questions that had been left hanging all this time. Some they had been afraid to ask. Others were insights into why the Dursley's did what they did. They had more questions now than answers. But if Severus was truthful to himself, he didn't need any more answers. Harry just needed support and honesty right now.

If he had been honest to himself, and not thinking like a Gryffindor last night, he would not have gone to the Muggle's home.

When they entered the infirmary to check on Albus' status, he was surprised to see him awake. The magical exhaustion alone should have kept him asleep for a month. It was Ron who spoke first, breaking the silence that surrounded them--giving into that look in Albus' eyes; the one that said he knew that they had done something without really thinking first.

"We paid the Dursley's a visit. "

"It was Fudge and his toad woman who paid them to get rid of Harry. To keep him quiet anyway they wished," Sirius whispered. He was still appalled at what they'd learned. Bill was standing behind him, rubbing his back in a soothing matter.

Albus closed his eyes, the pain of the revelation evident on his face. One of his children had been hurt, and he unknowingly contributed to it. Minerva laid her hand on his shoulder in a gentle silent gesture of support and comfort.

"We are all to blame in some way, Albus." Severus spoke, sadness evident in his voice.

The others bowed thier heads, all feeling guilt in thier own way, for not listening, when Harry had tried to tell them. Albus opened his eyes, and looked around at the faces, stopping on Severus'.

"What did you do to the Dursley's?" He asked quietly.

"Nothing that would put us in Azkaban," Charlie said, stepping closer to Severus. "Let's just say, they now have a healthy respect for magic."

"Well it's good we didn't bring the twins," Remus whispered to Lucius. The blond man snorted and nodded. Even some of the Death Eaters had been wary of the twin's reputation for wreaking havoc.

"Not that they hadn't wanted to come, but Mum cast Petrificus on them before they could get out the door." offered Ron, overhearing the exchange. There were several smiles and chuckles among the group. Albus' eyes twinkled at that.

"Well the plan was, to keep our visit quiet. It wouldn't do to alert the entire Muggle neighborhood to our presence." Minerva spoke, trying to look serious, though her eyes were twinkling as well.

"Why? Why did you have to go?" Harry asked, his voice just above a whisper, but enough to make them all jump at the unexpected interruption. He slipped quickly in between Remus and Sirius, and studied the faces around Albus' bed.

"Why couldn't we just forget about them? Forget they even exist?" Harry asked, frustrated. He knew they had meant well, but he didn't want these people he cared about to lower themselves to the subhuman level the Dursley's existed in.

"They hurt you Harry. We thought they needed..."

"Needed what, Ron?"

"You needed justice. You are my brother Harry, and you were hurt. They got away with it. Even now the mere mention of their name—it hurts you."

"Justice, Ron? Or revenge? Nothing will erase what they did to me. The scars, visible or not, will always be there." He looked around. "I don't want any of you---any of the people I love, sinking to their level of bigotry and violence."

"I trust they are unharmed?" Albus sat up a bit, with Poppy's assistance, placing extra pillows behind his back. He eyed Sirius, Remus, Lucius and Severus in particular.

"Physically, they are fine, Albus. But, their dreams, will be...troubled...for some time to come." Severus folded his arms, a frown creasing his brow. He would have liked to have done more to them, but the group had agreed on the punishment.

"It was a small empathy spell. One often used by Voldemort, though it isn't classified as dark magic. It was very effective." Lucius grinned evilly. It had been hard to just stand by and watch, but he knew his anger would have taken over. The Muggles would have just been smudges when he was done.

"Explain." Anger still shown in Harry's face.

"Isn't that the one pregnant witches and wizards use on their mates when they go into labor?" Poppy asked.

"One and the same." Sirius added with a grin. Angelo howled. Perfect, he thought.

Bill and Charlie winced, then Bill spoke. "I remember Mum casting that on dad when she was having the twins. Dad's screams were louder than hers."

Poppy snorted. Albus' and Harry's eyes were wide. "Oh my!" Albus exclaimed. Minerva laughed at the reactions. She had used that spell herself once or twice on her late husband.

Harry crossed his arms and glared. "Maybe I should tell Hermione about this spell?"

Charlie's face paled, making his freckles stand out even more. "Oi, Harry! No need for that!"

"How is a pregnancy spell going to punish the Dursley's?"

"Our Remus, the DADA expert, tweaked the spell to fit the situation." Lucius smiled as he wrapped his arm around his mate's waist. Remus blushed.

"It was quite easy actually. From now on, when they dream, they will relive their treatment of you, Harry, through your eyes, so to speak." Remus explained, slipping easily into his lecture voice. "They will see and feel everything you did, whenever they relive the experiences of mistreating you."

Harry winced, when he thought of what they would experience. He almost felt sorry for them, but no, they weren't worth that effort. It wouldn't be long and they would be begging for the relief of Dreamless Sleep Draught. "Maybe I should have just cast that on Tom Riddle and then walked away."

"That wouldn't have worked Harry. That demon lived off of misery---he thrived on it." Lucius added with a twisted sneer.

"How long are they to experience these dreams?" Albus was curious. He wasn't happy, but at least they had not done any physical harm. He was relieved he wouldn't be loosing almost half of his staff to Azkaban, though they technically violated the spirit of the law.

Harry still didn't look happy. His preference was to just wash his hands of the Dursley's and walk away. His feelings were apparent in his expression. Ron looked at him and sighed, feeling for his brother.

Harry glared at each of his friends, "Next time you feel the need to defend my virtue... ask me first?"

Ron sighed again. "Harry, please. After Sirius cast sticking and silencing charms, we told them what they missed out on. How much you would have loved them, if they had accepted you. That you would have willingly shared all you had with them, including your inheritance."

Harry snorted, "I bet Uncle Vernon almost burst a blood vessel."

Remus nodded. "We told them how much you care for people here who are your family now, and how many times you have risked your life for each of us. And we told them how you killed Voldemort to save the whole Wizarding World, and possibly the Muggle one as well."

"They will learn the hard way, that the path of acceptance and love would have been the better choice. They and you would have been so much happier." Severus' gaze softened as he watched Harry, more than familiar himself with an abusive childhood. "Now, they will have to live with regret instead."

Harry finally closed his eyes and nodded. Albus cleared his throat. "I'm still waiting for an answer."

Remus' face reddened. "Oh! They will experience the dreams until they each truly feel remorse for what they did, and feel a desire to apologize."

"Whether they actually apologize or not, to Harry, will be left up to them." Draco finally made his presence known. He was grinning, and spinning his wand between his fingers, as he thought of the harmless little prank spells he had left all over that Muggle house. They were his little 'secret gift' to the evil wankers.

"Harry," Sirius began, "You'll be happy to know that Dudley lives with his parents. He has no job."

"Somehow, Siri, that does not surprise me. Dudley always was allergic to work."

"He might end up cured, Remus hexed his computer," Bill added. "Every time he tries to use it, the mouse will bite him. And the screen will always show him his worst fears."

"And whatever he types will say some... other things." Ron giggled.

"That reminds me, Siri, what were you and Sev doing in that closet under the stairs?" Harry winced as Remus mentioned the closet. Severus' expression suddenly went blank, and Sirius feigned innocence. Remus, familiar with those expressions, wasn't fooled.

"Boys." warned Albus.

"Alright, alright." Sirius sighed. "It was just a little Boggart--not even full grown."

"As if that would matter... to a Muggle." Severus snorted.

Minerva gasped. "You didn't!" She put her hand up to muffle her giggles.

Harry closed his eyes--his godfather and Severus Snape working together. That, was just trouble, waiting to happen. What would happen next? The world would start revolving in reverse?

Angelo walked away from the humans. They should have taken him with them. He would have liked to have met Aunt Marge and her dog Ripper. Chasing his Harry up a tree and making him stay there like a cornered cat. He would have made sure, that lousy excuse for a dog, ended up in a tree.

Albus was chuckling and he wiped a tear. He couldn't help it. Who would have thought that there was anything that would have brought Sirius Black and Severus Snape together willingly? His blue eyes twinkled. Yes, they could have done much worse, but they had restrained themselves. He would look the other way, for now. But the Boggart would have to be retrieved at some point, since it's presence could become a larger problem. But they need not worry about that now. They had Christmas to plan.

Harry looked at all the faces around him, smiling, and he smiled back. Sighing, he spoke quietly. "Thank you all for what you meant to do. I understand it was because you care, but, can we now put them behind us? We do have more important things to do, after all."

"Yes, my boy! We have a Christmas to plan!" Albus smiled.

Everyone turned at the loud noise of the doors banging open. In ran the Weasley twins, Fred and George, dressed as Christmas elves; the bright red and green of their outfits clashing spectacularly with their hair and freckles, and wide grins plastered on their faces. Lucius winced noticeably when he saw them, and the atrocious outfits.

Poppy harrumphed as she reached over to plump Albus' pillows and pull up his blanket. "Yes, and you, old man, have resting and healing to do!" She waved everyone away. "Now, shoo! All of you. Albus needs his rest. You can visit him again tomorrow."

Draco crossed his arms, "I am not wearing anything like that. It would clash with my fair skin and hair!" Lucius snorted, along with Remus. Several of the others chuckled.

The twins flanked Draco, and leaned in close. "We could lose the green. You'd look spectacular in red velvet." Fred purred. "And white fur trimmed boots." Added George, causing Draco to blush.

"Oi! Get away from my husband!" Ron yelled. The twins stuck their lips out in a mock pout and moved to either side of Harry instead.

"Hmmm, I wouldn't mind seeing Severus dressed in red," Albus added. Severus glared at him. Too bad you can't hex a sick man.

Harry broke down into a fit of giggles and it warmed Severus' cold heart. Poppy made her shooing motions again, and everyone quickly vacated the room after saying hasty goodbyes to Albus.

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A/N:: I know everyone wanted _'Torture the Dursleys" _but I've read to many of those.. and like this way better...


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